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Open Question: The biggest decision I have ever made? and more... Open Question: The biggest decision I have ever made?Ok. This is a very odd situation to explain. I have been with my partner for over a year and I am completely in love with him. We practically live together and when i'm away from him I feel physical pain like I have never ever experienced before and want to be with him forever. My boyfriend says he loves me, all the time and this is not the issue. When I finish my education (I am 23) I really feel like I want to start my life with him, relocating to another part of the country and devoting myself to him. However, some little flags are popping up in my head and I am desperate for other people's opinions... I am aware that I am not his physical type. I am blonde, with an hourglass figure and pale skin, and he constantly reminds me that the girls he finds attractive are tanned, latino types (with atheltic bodies as he used to be an athlete.) His ex girlfriends have also been complete knockouts (i'm taking Eva Longaria look-alikes.) My boyfriend makes comments such as "If i won the lottery I'd pay for plastic surgery to make you look like Eva Longaria" I know he is joking but it gets to me as I know it is my personality that he loves and not my looks. The problem is I am 100% attracted to his looks and sometimes I feel like he puts me down when he calls me stuff like "tubby" and "chunky butt." I also feel like he is ashamed of me.... to the point where he never takes me out, he never treats me or spoils me, in fact he owes me a lot of money and it falls on me to use my savings to give him money for petrol, food etc. I have not even gone into detail here, but I need advice and really want an objective viewpoint..... But let me just say that I know he would not cheat on me, he has girls who flirt and follow him about a bit and I 100% trust him. My issue is that if I move in with him and start a new chapter in my life can I live with knowing that every time we have sex or I don't have makeup on I know he feels he could do better, and yes he has actually used the phrase "i know i could do better." If anyone has had a similiar situation I will welcome all feedback and advice, and if anyone has any questions or whats me to tell you more about the situation I will. but shouldn't I just get on with it and bite my tongue for the sake of being with the man I love for the rest of my life? Surely every relationship has issues and maybe if I dont like it bother me it won't matter... I know it may seem like Im clutching at straws but I want it to work more than anything. Open Question: Is it normal for me to miss him all the time?Okay so after i see my boyfriend.. i already miss him soo much..which is weird because i just seen him. I kinda feel like im addicted to him in a way..i always think of him always want to talk to him before i go to sleep or when i wake up. Is it normal..am i just inlove or do i have problems? lol What do you think? Any advice would help, thankss. Open Question: why is it such a problem to white girls and everyone else if us black girls go out with white guys?i started going out with my first boyfriend Aaron, whos white a week and 3 days ago. and for the love of god i didnt know itd be such a problem. to eveyone> espcially white girls. my black girl friends call me " a self hater with no taste in guys" along with the black guys. and all of Aarons friends seem to not like me, especially when i come and hug him or kiss him, they just stare in disqust and the other day his friend jake came up to me on the bus and said " aaron doesnt like you anymore because he'd rather smooch with a girl of his own kind" and that really hurt my feelings, i confronted him the next day and he said he'd never say that about me . and white girls(oh lord) i cant get enough of them. theyll stare, make comments, try to break us up, spread rumors. and funny thing is when they do spread rumors they like to say aaron is cheating on me but they dont ever say that i may be cheating. its like everyone is mad at me > not aaron<. like what is up with people? is our kind of relationship alien to everyone or what? i live in the south east (north carolina) didnt think itd be so segregated like this, geez! and i dont see people fussing about when a white girl and black guy go out. its even became normal. why do people hate me so much now, i use to have so many friends until i went out with aaron.its like there all out to attack me but not him (and i dont want them to its just that ive been through alot). should i just break up with him because our relationship isnt accepted, even though i still like him but cant deal with the drama no more Open Question: My boyfriend watches porn... What should I do?I know that men watch porn, but I think its wrong to if you're in a relationship. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years now. I caught him once and he sweared he never do it again. And of course I've caught him several more times. Just last week I caught him again, (and by "caught" I mean found it on the internet history) I know I shouldnt be snooping through his stuff but if he's lying to me about it I have the right to. Anyways, my whole problem with this is really that it makes me feel less of myself. He's looking at these girls with perfect bodies. & theres me. Im not unattractive to be honest. Our sex life is just 'blah'. We do it and its over. Nothing kinky, nothing sexy etc. & I would love to do those things for him but I dont feel comfortable because I feel like I cant compare to "porn girls". I really dont wanna sound immature but I dont know how else to put it I suppose. Not to mention that he doesnt compliment me, ever. He doesnt insult me in anyway but I mean it would be nice if I heard something nice about me? Then maybe I would do more for him. Anyways, I just dont know what to do. It really brings my confidence down about myself & I just want him to make me feel more special.. & one more thing, here's what happened about two weeks ago. I went to talk to his parents, & they called me fat, (jokingly) & honestly, Im NOT fat, I weigh 125lbs, 5'3, 18 years old. So I went to my boyfriend to comfort me, and I said, "Babe... Im fat" He says: "Says who?!" I said: "Your parents..." He says: "Do you want me to say something?" I say: "No..." He says: "Aw babe its okay" I was on my period so I was emotional so I start crying (pathetic I know)... He then says: "Aw babe its okay, its okay, just try & eat like 1 or 2 meals a day" Yeah! Like who the f*ck says that to their girlfriend? Anyways, that was just an example. Any other guy would be like: "Aw babe your not fat dont worry" etc. & I love him regardless but I would like him to change? Advice? Open Question: My boyfriend is depressed and I don't know what to do?I don't know what to do anymore. My boyfriend is extremely depressed. When I see him he's happy and things are fine, but if he doesn't see me for a few days he gets really depressed and mean. He seems to get set off by anything I say. Today I was talking to him and I said, "Hey, lets go to the movies this weekend. Would you watch the Princess and the Frog with Me?" We both like Disney movies so it seemed like a good idea. He said "Whats that?", but he was talking so low that I misunderstood it for "What do you mean?" I got confused and said, "I just mean what I said." He got really grumpy and said that he didn't like the way I was talking to him, even after he realized I'd simply misunderstood. He's been doing this sort of thing a lot lately and it hurts really bad. I feel like I'm getting jumped on over every other thing I say. He even gets mad when I'm in a good mood. When I tell him he's not treating me very nicely, he turns it around and blames it on me. He overreacts to little arguments we have and has broken up with me several times over really small disagreements and just calls back and gets back together with me within less than an hour. I think he needs to get on medication. He's been depressed for years now, but he won't listen when I tell him and says I'm just avoiding trying to make him feel better. I just don't know what to say to him anymore. Its really having a bad effect on our relationship. I told him months ago that if he didn't get help we were going to take a break. He keeps lying to me and says he will, but he never does. He's so down at this point that I don't even think he would care if we took a break or just broke up. He's completely cut himself off from other people. I'm pretty much the only person he ever talks to. He seems to have a terrible self image, even though he's quite attractive and seems to think that people are constantly looking down on him. His old friends try to hang out with him, but he always blows them off. I love him and I've been with him for almost three years now. I'm under a lot of stress from family problems and college and he's really making things worse. I don't know what to do. Has anyone else ever been in a situation like this? Does anyone have any advice? Also: He's not a bad person and he's not always like this. Its really painful to see him acting this way. I want to help him, but nothing I say seems to help. He says he doesn't even feel like we get along anymore. I think the reason he's like this is because he hates being stuck where he works and isn't sure what he wants to do with his life. He's very intelligent, but he just doesn't know what he wants. I think he feels trapped. Please help. More Recent Articles
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