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Open Question: What guy should I choose? and more... Open Question: What guy should I choose?Ok thanks for reading. I'm in a huge conflict right now. I've been dating this guy now for 3 1/2 years. I'm 18, he's 21. We have been through a lot of ups and downs. Within the last year he developed a drinking problem. We used to drink casually and almost every weekend. We had a lot of fun but then we began fighting when we drank together. He would get really mean and now he drinks by himself and lies to me about it. Not to mention, he has no goals for himself. He's gotten fired from EVERY job he's ever had, he's late all the time, lies, and drops out of the classes that his parents are paying for. He has been treating me very badly within the last year. He brings me down and makes my self esteem low. I do need to mention the good things keeping me in the relationship. He's charming and funny (when he wants to be.) He makes me laugh... In the last month, I've met a guy and have been hanging out with him for the last 3 weeks. He's an ex marine and treats me very nicely. He has his one place (unlike my boyfriend who still lives at home.) Anyway, we are really into each other and I find myself thinking about him a lot and comparing them. We have sooo much in common and he makes me sooo happy. He knows I have a boyfriend but he wants me to break up with him. Keep in mind, I have never done this to my current boyfriend before. Guys have been interested but I never let it get this far. I don't know what to do. I find myself feeling guilty but then my boyfriend will begin the verbal abuse and it will just push me back in this guy's arms once again. Telling my boyfriend is out of the question. I love him but I don't see a future with him unless he changes. Now I don't know if I see a future with this new guy either but he and I have a really strong connection. I should also mention that my current boyfriend is extremely immature and refuses to talk to me about jobs, money, college. He simply lacks motivation. To be blunt, he's a loser. This new guy is very mature. Hes not into drama unlike my current boyfriend who starts fights with me everyday. I should also mention that I'm very attached emotionally to my current boyfriend. I've given up a lot of friends and relationships for this relationship. He was also my first EVERYTHING. I don't know if that was relevant but I want you to be able to grasp the entire story. To me somebody who doesn't even try at anything they do is a loser. I didn't mean it to sound mean. Open Question: How do I deal with a boyfriends ex's without coming off as rude?So I've only talked about this to one friend but I though I could get better advice here as there are more than one opinion. Here's the deal. My boyfriend is still friends with some of his ex's AND they all go to our college. That's not what I am having a problem with. His last ex girlfriend was an acquaintance of mine 3 years ago. After a while she just stooped talking to me and we lost touch. My boyfriend and I started dating 2-3 months ago. It's been great and he's given me no reason to think he is a bad guy. He's always attending to my needs,taking me out,showing people he loves me IN PUBLIC at school so I know he's not embarrassed of me. Taken me to meet his best friends from high school and they liked me as well. The thing is his last ex GF's guy friend tried to add me as a friend on facebook. But only did so AFTER my boyfriend listed me as his girlfriend. This friend of hers and I do not get along yet he was trying to add me. After I rejected him, a month later SHE requested me as a friend. So to be nice I asked her why and she said she JUST realized who I was. And didn't know my last name(even though I'm on her myspace with my entire REAL NAME). She SAID congrats to our relationship but she still refuses to talk to me at school or other wise. It really just seems like she wants to see the things I say to my BF and see what I DO on my facebook. She's only commented once asking me how my day was. But she only asked because my BF kissed me and she saw it. Again I say, he doesn't care who sees that he loves me but some how I think she may be jealous. She's the one who broke up with him after all. She didn't want him and now she is being very sneaky. What can I tell her or do to deal with this? Open Question: Thinking of leaving everything behind, for love. Help please !?Thinking of leaving everything behind, for love. Help please !? Part 1 --- 13 years ago I met my very first love - we were young granted, but it felt like everything love was made out to be at the time. To keep this as short as possible I would say: years went by, and the girl I was so amazed by, taken by, was never tangible, she lived in Florida, I live in NY. Whether because of family, religion, relationships and even marriage (in my part) we could never come together except for those long and beautiful summers at the beginning stages of our history; although we both desired to be with each other, circumstances never left us with an opportunity, our friends kept telling us we were meant to be. Some more years went by and due to distance, and because we are both such physical people, we need a love we can touch, we went our separate ways, I married she found a boyfriend. We both thought it was the end of us. Part 2-- I got divorced earlier this year, we drifted, we disconnected along the way, never really felt the same way that I did with my first lady, still friends but, we both realized that we should not have been married, figured that out a tad too late, but nonetheless got divorced. When I married my ex wife, she had a daughter, beautiful girl, very happy and easy to love, I promised her the day of the wedding that I would not leave her, that I would be her father for the rest of her life (I said this because her father is not the best of fathers to say the least.) She was 8 at the time, and just now turned 12. I've raised this kid as if she was my own, I've given all of me to her even though she is not my biological daughter. We have a good relationship, and although I don't see her as much (once a week) she truly loves, sees, and feels as if I was her real father, I should also mention that I met her when she was 4. Part 3 -- Recently decided to take a trip to FL, catch up with old friends and yes, obviously to see my truly first love, she is in a relationship that is hanging by a thin, thin toothpick; he does not know how to treat her. I could go on for pages, trying to explain what we both felt when we saw each other, but I'll try to keep it short; we hugged, kissed, cried, made love for several hours, enjoyed our company beyond belief - our emotions were on fire, as if it was only yesterday that I had last seen her. so many years had been built up and I can't put into words how much thirst and passion we had, have for each other. Without exaggerating, we both felt strongly loved by each other, after 10 years of being apart. It wasn't puppy love, we had already gone through that, It was beautiful and I have only felt like that once before, and it was with her. Please look beyond the unfaithful part, as it's NOT what I'm asking a question about, and it's only obvious when you are treated the way he treats her. Part 4 -- THE PROBLEM I am now unemployed, going back to school in NY at the beginning of January and obviously still have my stepdaughter to think about. My FL lady, is finishing school there and has her family, they are very very close. Crazy thoughts are coming into my head to leave and move to FL and start my life with her .. search for work there and instead of starting school here, start there .. I have very close friends and family there, I know they will help me get on my feet .. but the ONE THING that I can't get around is, that I can't leave my daughter. My family is telling me that I need to for once, go after my happiness and jump in, that they have never seen me so happy as when I talk about my first lady, and they keep telling me that after all, this is not my daughter in reality, and that I have done much for her already .. but I can't fathom the thought of hurting my daughter by leaving her because of my promise to her, and because her first father left her as well. This is consuming me, and I am so so so torn, because I really want to be with her, but my daughter is got me by the ankle .. any advise, similar situations ?? any comments would be helpful Open Question: Boyfriend question..Ahh.?It feels weird that im asking people i dont know, but oh well. Haha. Alllrighttt, so i have this boyfriend. And the problem is that i dont see him more than once a week usually, and he is allllways talking to other girls. Always. I mean maybe im just jealous and paranoid, but i dont know....haahaha. Soo, should i break up with him or give him a chance? Or should i tell him about what im thinking. but that might make things a bit awkward. Hah. Helpp..? Open Question: Boyfriend Problems...please help!!!?ok so me and this guy have been going out for about a month and i really really like him. more than my two other serious bfs. i just feel horrible becasue i have somethings in my past that i fear are making him feel weird about me. i had sex with both those guys and about 3 years ago sent a picture of myself to a guy adn that got sent around everywhere and i went into a huge depression and hated myself. and still hate myself for that. 3 months ago i broke up with a bf of a year and then went out with my current boyfriend about a month ago. he tells me a lot that he likes me a lot but yet i still worry that my past makes me not as attractive. and im no slut. the two guys i had sex with i was with for a year both but i still regret the fact that it happend. i just worry all the time about my current boyfriend just waking up and saying he cant be with me because of the mistakes ive made. im a very paranoid person and read into little details about everything so its hard for me not to want to keep asking him and asking him if hes sure he still likes me but i try and hold myself back. please i need help on what to do with myself Open Question: I kissed a girl and I liked it?I'm 16 and I feel so confused and weird. Three weeks ago I was in a situation were my best friend who I love told me that she was bi/gay and it was very emotional and she kissed me and it wasn't an thanks for being a friend kiss it was kind of a make out type of kiss. (sry I'm not trying to be graphic). I liked the kiss and that what's wrong. I loved the kiss. The problem is/was I have a boyfriend that I love and we have been together for 2 ½ years. I told him about it yesterday on thanksgiving he was very accepting he takes me the way I am and he's a guy. ( he probably think its hott). But I told my mom about how I kissed a girl and since she and my dad are very religious people she told me that it was a accindant and that the feelings I have are "just a phase" and that I should be ashamed of the mistake that I made. She called me the antichrist. And I should just keep what I did a secret so I don't embarrass the family name. Since then she hasn't really talked to me. Until yesterday on thanksgiving I tried to talk to my dad before all the family came over. Hoping that he would be more understanding. He wasn't he told me I was the product of the devil. My dad told me he couldn't stand the sight of me and didn't want me at the dinner so I had to go to my friends house and then I spent the rest of the day with my boyfriends family when I told him. I've been trying to do what my mom And dad want me to do but I'm not her or the other religious people. I want to figure myself out. The last two times I saw my best friend I made out with her. Not purposely but it kind of happen and the last time it kind of got physical and I feel horrible about it. I feel like I'm extremely attracted to her and I feel like I see all women in this new light. But I feel like I'm cheating on my boyfriend and that he deserves better than that. He had been asking why I kind of have been distant with him before I told him yeasterday and to stop the questioning I did something we both have never done and weren't ready for I forced it on him I gave him oral sex and it was fun and it stopped him from all of the questions. Amd I kind of did it again to him today. He didn't want to but He seemd to like it and I also wanted to prove maybe that I still attracted to guys and I am. I love guys and I love him and I know he loves me.I want to be with him and only him but I keep having dreams and thoughts about my best friend none of the dreams and thoughts have me being faithful to him. I've never felt this way about girls and the more I think about it the more I want her and the more I do with her the more guilty I feel and feel I have to do more with my boyfriend. What is wrong with me? Am I gay? Do other girl go through this? How can I get my very religious parent to accept me? Am I the antichrist? Is this wrong? Why am I feeling this way if its not wrong? Open Question: I can't decide between my boyfriend and my best friend?have a problem, I like my best friend and my boyfriend. My boyfriend and I have been going out for a few months and my best friend told me he liked me a while back. He didn't know we were dating at that time, so it wasn't like he was trying to ruin our relationship. We had another talk and we both confessed we really like each other. But he needs his space and he can't be my best friend because he says it hurts too much to always think about me with another guy. I don't know which guy to choose they're both really different? My boyfriend I only knew a little bit before we started dating. He comes off as a bit of a jerk to others but in a way I find that attractive. He is the jealous type and a bit clingy but I know he cares so much for me. He buys me a lot of things but sometimes he verbally abuses me and calls me names but then he makes up for it. I know he's a sweet person inside. We've been through a lot of **** together but we always manage to pull through. My girl friends love him because he can be a charmer. All my guy friends hate him though because he can be a big jerk, but he makes me feel special because he's sweet to me. My best friend I have known for two years and he understands me better than anyone else possibly could. He's been there for me in every situation and spontaneously does things to brighten my day. I have always had a huge crush on him. He's the sweet and quirky kind. He's a nerd at heart but everyone loves him because he's cool at the same time. He genuinely cares about people and I can talk to him about everything. He's always been there even when I'm a complete ***** to him. I think I just feel that my best friend deserves better than me, and my boyfriend and I have been through a lot of stuff together. More Recent Articles |
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